I did it. It wasn't too bad. In fact, I'm hoping they all go so easily. It's pretty boring and long, but if you're interested, here's how it went:
First we watched a video of someone's grandmother telling us what chemo could do and what to look out for and when to call the doc or go to the hospital. She talked about red blood cells and white blood cells and platelets and fevers and hairloss and all sorts of wonderful things you never think you'll have to worry about.
The nurse, Patti, came back with papers to sign and Luke and I did our usual joking, but I can't seem to remember what the jokes were. There was a nice woman next to me that we were talking to who had ovarian cancer and it came back and she's doing chemo again for something like the third year. But she was cheerful and said it hardly bothered her. Luke took pictures of me and I imagine he'll get them up here when he figures out how to get them off the phone onto the page.
Then Patti pumped me up with saline and steroids. She injected the red one, adriamycin. This is the one I was warned could give you the "ants in the pants" feeling. I got lucky and felt no ill effects. It's also the one that causes complete hair loss. In case you are wondering, as I was, complete does mean complete. Every hair folicle. Even eyelashes. Even... well, you get the picture. It took about 15 minutes to inject.
Next, cytoxan. This one was to take an hour. I settled into the chair which was made, as all chairs are, for people with long legs. I have short legs. You can push a button and the chair becomes a recliner. Naturally, mine didn't quite work. The stool part came out, but it wouldn't latch. When I propped my feet on it the stool would slide back into the chair. I finally just took off my shoes and sat indian style on the chair. I was reading, but then my sinuses started to burn. And I had to pee, but I couldn't because I was all plugged in. Patti came by and I told her about the sinus pain. Yea, that's a side effect. Next time we'll set the machine to take an hour and a half and that might cause less of a problem. As soon as it was finished the burning went away. I did have a mild headache the rest of the day though. The whole time this is going on there are people having chemo in chairs all around and the pink ladies come through and offer to bring you drinks or lunch or anything they can.
We got there at 9 and where finally finished at 1. It should only take about 2 hours next time.
I felt a little off after that. I can't really explain any better than that. Just off. We tried to get a wig then, but the wig store was closed on Mondays.
Later my breathing felt funny and I could feel my heart beat. It wasn't racing, but I could feel every beat in my chest. I didn't want to move too quickly. I felt a little dizzy. But they gave me so much medication for nausea that I didn't feel sick in that sense. Kind of like you are coming down with something or just getting over something. And I was cold. I had to wrap a blanket around my head.
I went to bed at 9:30 and promptly woke at 12:30. I was up all night. Just wide awake. A little queasy, but I rubbed this stuff on my wrist, that was compounded at the pharmacy, and felt better. I tried reading. I tried emailing, but quickly found it was painful to look at the computer screen. I got hungry and ate a bowl of cereal at 1:30. Then I watched TV for a while. I turned it off and tried counting backwards from 100 and reciting multiplication tables through 12. Just couldn't relax. Of course it was the steroids, but I had completely forgotten about that. I should have taken a sleeping pill before going to bed, but it was too late now. I had to get up at 5 for work. At about 4 a.m. I gave up. I got up and cleaned the kitchen (everyone was too busy to wash dishes the night before) and scrambled eggs for breakfast. I was on time for work for the first time in forever. All this time I mostly felt a little weak, a little dizzy, with a mild headache. And my bones had started to ache, like if you sit too long in one position. But I also felt pumped.
Until about 10:30 am. Then, suddenly, I was exhausted. I went home from work and took a nap for about an hour and a half, but then I had to go back to the hospital between 2 and 4 for a shot that helps boost the blood cells. We're trying to arrange these shots to be given at Natch Par. Hospital, but yesterday I had to go to Schumpert for it.
Finally, I went for the wig. I had to go alone, but I think I did okay. I tried a bunch on. I tried one on that made me look like Sharon Osborne! Ultimately I picked a short one in a style close to what I've worn and close to my hair color. I think I'll probably mostly wear hats. I've got to go online and order some hats.
Luke's mom made me some caps. I told Luke that I needed a soft cotton cap to sleep in and it'd have to be pink so I could have some sense of femininity. Since I'll soon look like a bald fat man with a little head. Anyway, when I got to Flo's the cap she made was soft pink cotton! I slept in it and it was nice and warm and comfortable.
And that brings us to today. I feel weak today, but not sick. Just weak and tired. I took a nap in my office at lunch time today. Then I was much better for the rest of the day. I'm glad I don't have to go anywhere tonight. I've had enough of that. Now I'm going to brown some hamburger for dinner. Patti told me to eat a lot of protien and that's fine, because I don't really want anything.
I keep feeling my lump, but it feels the same. I know it's only been a couple days! But heck, give me sign!
Singing old 70's tunes on the drive home helped me feel better, so a blast from the past, everyone sing with me:
Oooh ooh, child, things are gonna get easier
Oooh ooh, child, things'll be brighter!
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