Okay, all kidding aside, this sucks! Apparently it's going to be my lot to experience every evil thing chemo has to offer. I hate to recite a bunch of complaints, but this one hasn't been so easy. When they injected the chemo (remember no more port) the vein in my forearm blew and the chemo leaked into my arm. This left a giant "burn" which irritated a nerve. The burn itself didn't (doesn't) hurt much worse than sunburn, but the nerve, HOLY SHIT, that hurts!
It wasn't immediate. It took a few days and of course, reached fruition on Saturday afternoon (Dancing Day in the morning, pain in the afternoon). I called the weekend number where a chipper girl answered and said, "Is this an emergency? Because I'm not supposed to get the doctor unless it's an emergency." I yelled at her. I said, "How the hell am I supposed to know if it's an emergency? Nothing like this has ever happened to me!" She got the doctor. I lost it with the poor doc on call, telling her that I just couldn't stand it anymore. You're given numbers to call and when you do you're made to feel like you shouldn't be bothering people. She wanted to know who made me feel that way and I told her.
Anyway that was the beginning of an exceptionally bad week. By Monday I had fever and they wanted me to come and see my onc. He felt bad but said there was nothing to do but wait it out and he gave me pain killers and told me to put heat on it. Then he sent me for a flu shot.
That night I woke up vomiting. My fever kept coming and going all week and I was unbelievably tired. Friday morning I woke up with 102.2 fever. They want you to go to the hospital if it's 100.1. At the hospital they took blood and did cultures. My hemoglobin had dropped from Monday. It was 8. I think it's supposed to be between 12 and 16. (I'm going to check that when I have time). This accounted for the headache and shortness of breath I'd been experiencing.
Anyway, they gave me two units of blood, but they couldn't find the blood designated for me by a friend naturally. Then they sent me home as my fever was down. I felt like crap all weekend and couldn't move. In fact I mostly slept through Monday. I did manage to get up and go to work yesterday and I'm about to go now.
My arm is peeling now and looks really gross. It alternates between numbness and pain. My mouth hurts, I have a sore on my tongue, and every time I take a deep breathe it sends searing pain through my throat/chest (I can't tell anymore where the pain is). I don't know how much more of this I can take.
2 comments:
OMG! What a horrible experience!
And in reference to another of your posts regarding antidepressants and your right to your feelings, you are so right on with that! You have every right to feel what you feel and to express it. Cancer sucks and there sure doesn't seem to be anything out there that makes it a "good time".
I like your straight forward posts and honesty. I am getting really tired of the media and others trying to sugar coat what life is like with cancer, the treatments, the doctor appointments and the complete disruption of a person's life when trying to deal with it all.
Thank you both for visiting my blog. I appreciate your comments and please come back and make comments any time.
Sunnyside, my favorite TV pet peeve is the neulasta commercial where the people say, "I'm ready to fight cancer." As if the neulasta shot makes it all so easy.
Dawn
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